From Dusk to Dawn 2: Texas Blood Money

[Jonathan]

D2D2 is a dreadfully boring movie with less than five minutes of pure awesome. The awesome part is Bruce Campbell and Kelly from Saved By The Bell as slimy defense attorneys who get attacked by a horde of vampires in bat form. It goes downhill from there. Let's list D2D2's sins!

Giving Bruce Campbell plenty of billing, despite the fact that he is only in the beginning in a cameo role.
Starting out with the awesome movie-within-a-movie with Bruce and quickly and abruptly switching to a the actual, far crappier movie.
Not having any female characters other than Kelly from Saved By The Bell, who is part of the bait and switch in the beginning.
No T, no A.
Nothing remotely resembling the gags from the original. In fact, a lot of the fight scenes involve guys getting hit and flying through the air. I guess a guy on a rope is cheap.
Inexplicable POV cuts!
None of the pathos or relationships between characters that made the first one fun. Robert Patrick is definitely not a bad motorscooter.
Robert Patrick.
No action

[Jonathan]

in the Titty Twister.
Showing how really old Danny Trejo is now. Seriously. He's the granddaddy of evil bad asses. Literally.