Wisdom?

Posts you want to find years later go here.

Wisdom?

Postby Jason » Mon Oct 27, 2003 5:01 am

I need a place to write down all the quotes or words of wisdom I come across and seeing as I'm a lazy ass, I've decided to do that on the bboard.

Thought this was interesting, especially from a CS prof.
http://www-2.cs.cmu.edu/%7Eolston/desiderata.html
User avatar
Jason
Veteran Doodler
 
Posts: 1520
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2003 11:53 pm
Location: Fairfax, VA

Postby Jason » Mon Oct 27, 2003 5:08 am

Here's a bonus one for the day (it might be construed as sexist):

When a man says no, there's a 90% chance that he means it. The other 10% of the time, he says it only because he's in trouble. When a woman says no, there's a 70% chance that she means it. Out of the remaining 30%, 20% of the time she says it because she's in trouble. The final 10% of the time, she doesn't mean it, but whoever she's talking to had better realize it or their in trouble.

Corollary: This does not hold for lawyers and habitual liars.
User avatar
Jason
Veteran Doodler
 
Posts: 1520
Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2003 11:53 pm
Location: Fairfax, VA

Postby VLSmooth » Tue Oct 28, 2003 2:42 am

Apparently my Random Quote thread wasn't good enough. :(

Here are a few more:

So I had this professor at UVA that originally got me interested is CS.. and he told us this really funny quote. Wait, will I get in trouble for saying something offensive if I'm quoting someone else? [consensus: no] Ah, okay. Well, I had this teacher.. here I'll make it less offensive. He said:

"Programs should be like your Significant Other; they should be fast and easy."

There, I didn't use any bad words and I still have a chance at tenure.
-- Shumeet Baluja
You know you've become truly pathetic when you being thinking of women as servers and men as clients and realizing, "whoa, that explains everything."
-- Len Lanphar
Congratulations! You have purchased an extremely fine device that would give you thousands of years of trouble-free service, except that you undoubtably will destroy it via some typical bonehead consumer maneuver. Which is why we ask you to PLEASE FOR GOD'S SAKE READ THIS OWNER'S MANUAL CAREFULLY BEFORE YOU UNPACK THE DEVICE. YOU ALREADY UNPACKED IT, DIDN'T YOU? YOU UNPACKED IT AND PLUGGED IT IN AND TURNED IT ON AND FIDDLED WITH THE KNOBS, AND NOW YOUR CHILD, THE SAME CHILD WHO ONCE SHOVED A POLISH SAUSAGE INTO YOUR VIDEOCASSETTE RECORDER AND SET IT ON "FAST FORWARD", THIS CHILD ALSO IS FIDDLING WITH THE KNOWS, RIGHT? AND YOU'RE JUST NOW STARTING TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS, RIGHT??? WE MIGHT AS WELL JUST BREAK THESE DEVICES RIGHT AT THE FACTORY BEFORE WE SHIP THEM OUT, YOU KNOW THAT?
-- Dave Barry, "Read This First!"
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
-- Rick Cook
Remember Darwin; building a better mousetrap merely results in smarter mice.
-- Unknown
User avatar
VLSmooth
Tenth Dan Procrastinator
 
Posts: 3048
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:02 am
Location: Varies

Postby VLSmooth » Tue Nov 04, 2003 2:08 am

An Academic speculated whether a bather is beautiful if there is none in the forest to admire her. He hid in the bushes to find out, which vitiated his premise but made him happy.

Moral: Empiricism is more fun than speculation.
-- Sam Weber(?)
User avatar
VLSmooth
Tenth Dan Procrastinator
 
Posts: 3048
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:02 am
Location: Varies

Postby skanks » Sat Jan 31, 2004 11:44 pm

In the typical transitional style of The New Yorker's best work, a provacative and eye-opening investigation into SUV safety (both real and imagined) evolves into a reflection on human attitudes towards risk. An empowering article by Malcolm Gladwell:

http://www.gladwell.com/pdf/suv.pdf
skanks
Poser
 
Posts: 290
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2003 5:16 am


Return to The Vault

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron